My mother and I share this love-hate relationship.  Other people tell me that the love and hate that we share are blatant.  Will Philly and I share the same two strong feelings?  Sometimes I can't really explain my relationship with my mother.  I'm relieved when other women can just instinctually relate because they share the same sort of quirky relationship with their moms.

I figure, it boils down to this: moms are naturally domineering and bossy.  They're moms, after all.  For decades, they tell their kids what to do or what not to do.  For some mothers, this imposing behavior continues perpetually.  Their kids, in return, can be rebellious in response to the reigns of control applied on them.  They want to defy, rebel, lash out.  I suppose that's what happened to me.  It's not that I wanted to defy or to rebel, I just wanted to break free from the leash I felt that my mother had put on me.  I wanted to be the one to decide for myself: if I was going to wear a leash, I wanted to be the one to put it on.

My mother has always been genteel, proper, "lady-like", graceful and charming.  I have always been coarse, tomboyish, caustic and sometimes socially-awkward.  I didn't like my mother always trying to make me something that didn't feel natural for me.  What about Philly?  What will she be like?  Am I going to try to be a "mom" and make her be something I think she ought to?  Am I going to try to make Philly be all that I couldn't or wouldn't?  Am I going to try to make Philly do anything?